May 2006

120 Second Statcheck: Standings Briefing

1)Detroit, even after a 3-game losing streak, has the best record in the Majors.

2)Toronto, even w/some injuries, is holding strong at 29-22.  Their thus far cohesive play has surprised this writer.  On watch.

3)No team in the NL West has a losing record.  This, after a 2005 in which San Diego had to win 5 of their last 6(82-80)to be the only team in that division with a winning record.

4)I reiterate the unanswered question: how can there be 6 teams in the NL Central and only 4 in the AL West?

5)Perennial losers Pittsburgh, Seattle, Kansas City are holding true to form.  The aforementioned Detroit Tigers(35-17), and the Colorado Rockies(27-25) are bucking that trend. 

6)The Washington Nationals(20-31) are looking like their Montreal Expos roots.

7)The Cubs?  20-31.  Will probably have an uptick w/Lee, Prior, Wood, Miller coming back.  Good enough for 79-82 wins, a Dusty extension, and 3 more years of baseball purgatory.

Peace, E Maj

reach me at bbheckler@yahoo.com 

A Tale of Two Cities

A Tale of Two Cities:

‘It was the best of times, it was the worst of times.’

The first page of the famous Dickens novel aptly describes the state of feeling in Chicago fandom these days, and this divergence of WhiteSox euphoria and Cubs despair was on full display in the crosstown series. Both of these franchises have fabled histories, and have maintained a co-dependence based as much on futility as geography. Is it possible we saw a changing of the guard this past weekend w/Chicago going from a Cubs to a WhiteSox town? The plot took a dramatic twist on Saturday, even by Windy City standards. After getting bowled over at the plate, Cubs catcher Michael Barrett tried literally to beat the "dickens" out of A.J. Pierzynski, landing a cheap haymaker, and igniting a bench-clearing brawl.(Barrett later received a 10-game suspension for his Jerry Springer-like theatrics). The notorious and emotional Pierzynski, somehow kept his feet after the blind-sided blow, and more impressively, kept his cool.

"It was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness."

The brilliance of Ozzie Guillen and his diverse staff, old-school coaches who stress fundamentals, accountability, and team play. Cubs manager Dusty Baker has seemingly assembled a staff of ‘yes’ men devoid of creative thought. Over the last 2 years, the Cubs have repeatedly made mental errors. Missed signs, not covering first, botched pickles, not knowing how many outs there are, etc. The Cubs have invented ways to lose, and invented ways to excuse themselves from it as well.

"It was the epoch of belief, it was the epoch of incredulity."

Ozzie sticking by young reliever Neal Cotts two years ago, paying big dividends in last year’s run. The improbable story of the unknown closer Bobby Jenks. Staying true and able to change the face of the franchise, letting the petulant Frank Thomas depart. Not being complacent after reaching the ultimate prize, willing to assume risk trading fan favorite OF Aaron Rowand, to acquire the big upside of a Jim Thome who was injured last year. The Cubs, in contrast, have watch countless players underachieve. Corey Patterson, Kerry Wood, Mark Prior, Kyle Farnsworth, et al. While these eyes don’t have all the answers, it appears the North Siders haven’t even grasped the questions.

"It was the season of light. It was the season of darkness."

The South Side has its first World Series ring in 88 years as a result of the Ozzie/Kennyball Era, and are playing solid baseball this year as they mount their defense. After missing the playoffs 2 years in a row, The North Side watched their MVP candidate Derrick Lee break his wrist in a freak accident, and suffered through an unthinkable 4-19 stretch as of press time.

"It was the spring of hope, it was the winter of despair."

In 2004, the WhiteSox television ratings on WGN/WCIU and Fox Sports were 3.7 and 2.1 respectively. Thus far in 2006, they are 4.6 and 2.6, increases of 24 and 19 percent. The Cubs ratings in 2004 were 9.1 and 6.5. This year, 4.9 and 3.4, DECREASES of 46 and 47 percent. The anecdotes are many, but these real numbers are remarkable.

"We had everything before us, we have nothing before us."

The WhiteSox are playing like champions, seeking to defend their crown, and would make the playoffs were the season over today. The Cubs? Re-signed to speculation of whom they will ‘sell’ come the trading deadline, and this before the month of May has reached a conclusion.

Summary: Just as the backdrop of Dickens’ "A Tale of Two Cities’ itself, which was set in a time of revolution in France, we are witnessing a baseball revolution in Chicago. There is a renaissance on the South Side, which has been perpetuated by Manager Ozzie, GM Kenny Williams, and CEO Jerry Reinsdorf being true, getting back to real baseball, and looking inward to make difficult decisions. The Cubs have held themselves hostage by deflection of blame, conventional thought, and talking rather than doing. Proactive vs Reactive. Independent thought vs corporate groupthink. Wanting to win vs wanting the almight dollar.

Going forward the Cubs will occasionally get their once a decade playoff ‘cup of coffee’, which will keep hope alive, the turnstiles moving and stale 7 dollar beers selling. Yet until the suits of the Tribune Company decide to divest the Cubs franchise and have a progressive owner come in, Cubs fans can can look forward to much more of the same mediocrity.

A.J. Pierzynski took the high road in the weekend altercation with Barrett, a development as unlikely as Chicago becoming a WhiteSox town.  Representative of a squad more interested in winning, than extra-curricular activity or tomfoolery.  Kenny Williams, GM of the WhiteSox, said earlier this year he wouldn’t be happy until his squad was number #1 in Chicago, not just the league. If they’re not there yet, they are well on their way. Times do change. A Tale of Two baseball ‘Cities’, indeed.

Peace, E Maj

The Professor Waketh

http://www.chicagotribune.com/sports/columnists/cs-060525rogers,1,6287046.column?coll=chi-sportscolumnist-hed&ctrack=1&cset=true

Great piece on the state of Chicago baseball by Phil Rogers!  End to end.  Bravo.

Peace, E Maj

bbheckler@yahoo.com

Dinosaur Paul Sullivan: Tribune Lackey

A very good representation of old media/new media: a clip from a 2/28/05 interview of Cubs Tribune beat writer Paul Sullivan(scared entitlist dinosaur, funny, just read the link) and Daily Herald Sox writer Scott Gregor(embracing technology).  Fast forward to a simple critique of today’s article by the BBheckler.  Enjoy. 

http://chicagosportsreview.com/news/newsview.asp?c=146710 here’s a snippet:

How much attention do you pay to baseball bloggers and fan message boards?

PS: None. I never read them. I know some of the other beat writers that read them, but I don’t have the time or the desire. Sometimes people will email me a link to a fan site where someone is drilling me for something I wrote. I’ve learned never to respond. Some of these people are downright nuts. No offense to you, but everyone with a PC and a printer believes they’re a writer. That’s the worst aspect of the Internet Age — everyone has something to say and a blog to say it in.

and then today’s article on AJ and Barrett….hilarious…check it out, and some highlights:

http://www.chicagotribune.com/sports/baseball/whitesox/chi-0605240224may24,1,2799658.story?coll=chi-sportscubs-hed&ctrack=1&cset=true

"Michael Barrett was completely in the wrong for punching A.J. Pierzynski in the face "….."His petulant act will lead to a lengthy suspension that could kill any hopes the Cubs have of salvaging their season."

2 Paragraphs Later:

"and he deserves nothing but praise from long-suffering Cubs fans for standing up for himself"

‘Nothing but praise’ for ‘acts of petulance’, ‘killing hopes of a team’s season’, and for someone he wrote was ‘completely in the wrong’.  All within 3 paragraphs. Nice journalism Paul.  As proxy for the blogosphere, we request you hang up your entitlist Tribune cleats.  Either that or the free market and technology will prevail over time.  You pick.

Peace, E Maj

bbheckler@yahoo.com

Thirteen Questions

we here at the BBHeckler believe it’s often better to have some of the questions, rather than all of the answers, here’s 13

1)Donde’ esta’ Sammy Sosa?

2)How many homeruns will Albert Pujols hit this year?

3)Has the MLB Player’s Union been emasculated, i.e., lost power, through this whole Steroids mess?

4)Why are so few writer/readers talking about Mike Lowell(.331 BA, 21 doubles) as an AL all-star other than those on this Weblog?

5)Has ESPN reached critical mass?

6)Who wants in on a historic, stealth, snow-whiffleball game next winter?

7)How long before the Cubs Dump Dusty?

8)Why was leading statistical site Baseball Prospectus so anti-Guillen, Little, Leyland the past 2 years, and also at the Chicago Pizza Feed?

9)Will Barry Bonds make the Hall of Fame?  Sosa? Palmiero? McGuire? and how will the Steroids Era be remembered 50 years from now?

10)When will Dr. Scholl’s call me to be their foot odor spokesman?

11)Why have no writers cracked on Billy Beane for the fact Moneyball may be  flawed and he may have realized that this year?

12)Will the Tigers fade?

13)Are the Yankees done?  Are they not just because I just posed that?..(lol)

many more questions, let’s make this a weekly thing!…

Peace, E Maj

bbheckler@yahoo.com

p.s. thanks for everything…baseball fun has just begun!

Ozzie Release

Will bang out the feature tomorrow.  Tonight watching Cubs(sigh) on one screen, Whitesox on other(big skirt w/2 bombs!), and RedSox/Yanks on the 3rd(Schilling brought it, Foulke to the glue farm)…NBA on another, and laptop for the rest…uh oh, only 10 min. juice left on the comp. and the High Life only 2 ounces left…decisions….alright, a quick Ozzie thought…

2nd inning of the WhiteSox game….Garland gives up an HR to Frank Thomas in the Big Skirts’ return to the Windy City….Jonny G then gives up another bomb to Bobby Crosby, and a double to the wall….Ozzie comes out to the mound…

Umpire comes out to break up the ‘candlesticks’ talk and the mound, and the Venezuelan Columbo is none too pleased….Ozzie gives him a mouthful all the way back to the plate, and proceeds until he gets tossed….

1)Maybe he just needed a day off, after an intense weekend.  Ozzie took the high road all weekend,  because that was the true road.  Let sleeping Cubbie Bears  lie.  Ozzie gets this.  And he did.  The only person he ‘talked trash’ to, as Rick Telander of the Trib would have you believe, was Rich Hill, one of the few other than Mariotti who thought the initial play was ‘gutless’. 

2)Ozzie isn’t crazy, he’s just the Venezuelan Columbo.  He had to re-assert himself as the craziest in the ‘asylum’.  A.J. respects Ozzie, but maybe only ‘cuz he’s afraid of him.

3)Ozzie had a ton of justification to go off on the umps this wkend, and he ate it.  Oakland is a potential playoff matchup.  Ozzie let the umps know he’s not going to sit like some overpaid North Side manager who did the same in 2003,—-i guess 1 out of 4 yrs isn’t bad—-NOT…DUMPDUSTY.

peace, E maj

bbheckler@yahoo.com

A Hill of Beans

(Yo—working on a big piece on the significance of the Saturday Cubs/WhiteSox brawl for www.spikesballparks.com ….in the meantime, let’s piecemeal some extra thoughts together/provoke some discussion)

Michael Barrett, Cubs catcher and main perp Sat: "He(Pierzynski) made a great play in taking me out before the ball could get to me."

Dusty Baker, Cubs manager: "From my vantage point I saw a clean play

Rich Hill, Saturday’s starter, and 0-6 w/a 9.21 ERA in 8 career starts: "I think it was pretty gutless over there on their part, him hitting Michael when he didn’t have the ball….That’s not how you play the game."

In related news, Rich Hill was demoted to Triple A on Monday.  I’m thinking the Rich Hill Era in Chicago has come to a close.

Peace, E Maj

bbheckler@yahoo.com

Sox On Parade: Airplane-Style

(to help steer you from the near constant redundancy of MLB/ESPN reporters, and, because E Maj has located another tub of glue paste that he likes to eat….we bring you this….he’s on assignment tomorrow, and has promised us a coherent take on the Redline Series debacle once he returns….will he return?..how the **** do I know?….enjoy!?…—ED.)

In the 2nd inning today, on a bang-bang knockdown play at the plate, Michael Barrett threw a big right-hand at A.J Pierzynski and benches cleared.   (whoops, I was playing an ESPN reporter for my acting class….how ’bout instead we go to the actors from Airplane, the movie, for their take)

"yo, down on 35th there was a lot of extra-curricular on the baseball front!….Lost then found Jedi A.J.Pee used his ‘Force’ to induce non-home Cub dog M.B. to de-brain himself into a 20-game solstice…

1/2 million Barrett benjies out courtesy of TribWhoreCo w/the bouncer MLBCo…fight in the sandbox, old school, Cubs frontin’ feelin’ the DumpDusty heat…Wizard of Oz, fading the peeps true wit voice of reason…Venezuelan Colombo, true dat…

Cubbie go limp, Neifi-style, doin’ 2nd baseman lineup like a crack and a pipe….shiiiiittt…Daley laughin’ at Blago-Blagovich, grabbin’ straight no cherry…

faithful north blasphemous convertin’, sick o’ drinking Mold Pile(Old Style) and Dusty junk…Rock Raines havin’ so much good times he no need not the…..Ahhh, the WhiteSox is good….

Peace, E Maj

bbheckler@yahoo.com

Sands Through the Hourglass: a Rant from the Bleachers

Yo Yo(Ma)–

There’s 9 minutes left in the day, at least by the plebian linear system version of time recording.  I thought I’d share a beautiful A.D.D. day with you people of negotiable morals.  What is time anyway?…(Whoops, wrong site, I digress).  Maybe it’s the Cubs mediocrity.  Maybe it’s my pungent foot odor.  Maybe it’s the fact most people think 2 times zero should equal zero.  (Can one digress from a digression?.). 

I  respect everyone’s right to choose their path, their journey, to live as they may.  Mine personally is to experience something, experience as much as possible every single day.  We’re all eventually going to take a nice long dirtnap.  As Tim Robbins’ character in ‘The Shawshank Redemption’ said, "Better get busy living before you get busy dying."

**worked on my ventures for 5 hours in the morning**

**talked to a scout about his baseball foundation, and queried how can I help**

**read books with my 2 yr-old daughter**

**received a letter to throw out an Opening Pitch for a minor league team(more later)**

**watched the Cubs(sigh!) get outplayed by the WhiteSox**

**helped the wife w/the Zen garden**

**Read a bunch of pages, and wrote about it**

**rode on a boat on the Chicago River, for an impromptu, informal Architechural Tour**

**hung out w/friends Jimmy and Marty, the latter of whom still thinks 2′s beat 3′s in poker**

**laughed at least 30 times today w/30 different people…noice**

**bot St.Ides at the local shop as a joke….(it was not consumed, thankfully)

**played billiards for 1 hour**

**figured out the Steroids Era(you’ll have to wait…for now)**

**went to see a cool Southern Rock band, the Drive By Truckers(thanks Rob)….i am tired, but experiential learning is where it’s at**

tomorrow is another day, and as always is promised to no one….so stop holding that flatulence in, Let it rip!!..

Peace, E Maj

bbheckler@yahoo.com

(Disclaimer:  Pleae direct all flatulence questions to the Ed at editor@dumpdusty.net if you wish to start training to be a flatulent Jedi…)

 

The Wrigley Vultures are Circling

There are rumors that Dusty Baker already HAS an extension, but having lost 14 of 16 games the Cubs can not announce it yet.  HUH!?  He is one of the highest paid managers in the game, and whilst 2003 was a great ride, he HAS failed the Wrigley faithful. 

Last year Dusty was paranoid most of the year(more on this later).  He’s a little more centered this year, and the Cubs greet his return to balance by getting struck by the injury bug. 

Bottom line:  Injuries are part of the game.  Dusty and the Cubs talk too much, and DO too little.  What I see is the endemic corporate nature of the Tribune Co.(owner) more worried about pimping fans for a few benjamins than actually winning.  The Trickle Down Effect.  Jim Hendry, GM, has lost some of his P and V.  inside Hendry voice after a couple yrs on the job: "Wow.  I have a really cool job.  I’m ON TV!!!…YES!!..I am corporate Lion, Hear Me NOT Roar!"….

Hendry is a semblance of the man who shook things up in 2003, submitting himself to groupthink, groupspeak, because that’s the culture.  Just one child-man’s opinion.  But what do I know? (we would like to offer all our phantom farts to the Cubs/Tribune upper MGMT—-ED.).(NOTE: since we can’t be sure that E Maj is not writing in a foot-odor induced haze, we are not obligated to subscribe to them legally–ED.) 

There have been poster signs of ‘Fire Dusty’ at Wrigley.  And some DumpDusty rumblings as well.. http://www.cafepress.com/tshirtsale .  The man makes $4.5 million guaranteed.  Please stop playing the victim  Dusty.  Just manage.  (Sigh)

Peace, E Maj

bbheckler@yahoo.com

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